The Giving of Thanks

My son's first snowfall comes on his first Thanksgiving. How memorable is that?! I laid in bed last night thinking about what he would be thankful for if he were able to speak. It would be the simple things like being well fed, having a fresh diaper and feeling the warmth of his mother's embrace. The simple things in life are truly something to be grateful for. On this day, I am reminded of all the beauty in my life. I hope you all can say the same.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Parenthood - The New Journey

I write while the tv is on and my son is slowly falling asleep beside me on the couch.  This is much different than my usual environment for blogging.  I tend to have silence or occasionally some motivational music, and I can't forget that cup of coffee.  However, since the arrival of little Virean, my world has been turned upside-down and even inside-out.  I wouldn't trade him for anything life has to offer, but that doesn't make things much easier.  He will be three weeks old tomorrow, and nothing could have prepared me for the length of time it would take to transition into this new life.  In three weeks I have learned how much of a mess can come out of such a small body, that keeping my house clean is nearly impossible with a newborn around, and that I really should have cherished sleep while I was getting it.  I have also learned how to view the world from innocent eyes, the feeling brought by holding your own child in your arms, and to cherish every moment as I watch him grow.

While Josie was pregnant, I did my research not only on pregnancy related topics but also on child-raising.  I sort of left out the baby time-period in my studies, which has created quite the whirlwind of disaster at times.  There is frustration within me when I have to get up in the middle of the night to care for him while he screams in my ear, but I am quickly learning to deal with it.  My frustration is simply proof that my ego and selfish desires are trying to stay alive.  They have very little place in our home when there is a child depending on me.  The truth is there is no way to fully prepare oneself for the caring of an infant.  You learn as you go, and sometimes it seems the greatest lesson of all is to put your own needs aside.

That being said, my next step is to bring back the passions of my life while continuing to care for Virean.  I put my music, art, and blogging aside for months now, and I can feel the pull of them calling me again.  He has brought me much inspiration, and I can't wait to create beautiful works using it.  Finding balance (which is something I have always struggled with) will be harder now than it ever has been, but it is the one thing that will sustain my happiness. 

And let's face it, if I want to teach my son how to be happy in his life, I have to first be happy in my own.